chpt 8 PREPARATION OF THE ADULT - 4

DOING OUR BEST
The wisdom from the book The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz sums it up so well:


1. Be impeccable with our word. Our baby is watching us. Let them see us speaking the truth. In a sensitive way.


2. Don’t take things personally. Our baby will cry. They are telling us something. We are there to listen. But we don’t need to blame ourselves.


3. Don’t make assumptions. If we are not sure, check. It’s amazing how many times we make assumptions about something someone said that was not their intention.


4. Always do our best. Even when we have had very little sleep, what is the best we can do today? Perhaps today we will parent from bed, put on some music, postpone some appointments, lie down next to our baby, and let go of everything else.


In the end it is not about perfection. It’s about presence. So let’s aim for connection over perfection.


TO PRACTICE


• Can we build time for a self-care activity into our daily routine?


• Can we start a daily gratitude routine where we celebrate one thing that we did?


• Can we do something that is just for ourselves at least once a week?


• Can we forgive ourselves for the moments that don’t go well and embrace our efforts more than perfection?


“The baby’s fundamental need—precisely because he is a human being—is to be loved. But it takes a mature person to love a baby, because love takes time, love takes patience, love takes fortitude, love even requires a certain kind of humility: to love another better than one’s self. The baby needs time to be understood: he needs time in everything he does.”


—Taken from a speech given by Dr. Herbert Ratner, editor of Child and Family, to the American Montessori Society in 1963