绝望主妇 | 精讲第64期: 失恋疗愈法

S01E16

Scene 1

Edie: "So, uh, where was Susan today?" 
Lynette: "She's going through something, and I'm sure she'd prefer it to be private." 
Edie: "She's upset with Mike, isn't she? Well, come on. I'm gonna find out sooner or later." 
Lynette: "She's devastated about the breakup, and she hasn't left the house in days."

Edie: "Well, why didn't you just tell me that?" 
Lynette: "Because it's personal. It's the kind of thing she would only want me to tell her friends." 
Edie: "I'm Susan's friend. Well, I don't hate her." 
Lynette: "Edie, if you want me to share stuff with you, you're gonna have to start being more supportive of Susan." 
Edie: "Okay. How?" 
Lynette: "What do friends do? They call, they're sympathetic, they ask about the pain the other person is going through, and then they listen." 
Edie: "What if you want to be supportive, but you just can't stand listening to people bi*ch?" 

Scene 2

Edie: "What are you doing?" 
Susan: "I decided that my life is way too complicated, and so I'm simplifying. I am getting rid of the clutter. Okay, not to be rude, but is there a reason you're here?" 

Edie: "Look, I'm feeling badly about what you're going through with Mike. And don't worry. I'm not going to date him." 
Susan: "Doesn't matter anymore." 
Edie: "Well, don't get me wrong. I still have every intention of sleeping with him. Some mountains are just meant to be climbed."

Edie: "How long have you been sitting here?" 
Susan: "I don't know. Five minutes, give or take three hours." 
Edie: "That's it. Get up. Get dressed."

Susan: "Why?" 
Edie: "Beause you're coming with me. It's time to get wasted. Happy hour started forty-five minutes ago."

Susan: "Why would I go anywhere with you?" 
Edie: "Because that's what normal women do when they get depressed. They put on short skirts, they go to bars with their girlfriends, maybe have one too many and then make out with some strange man in the back of a dark alley." 
Susan: "Wow."

Edie: "Oh, come on. It'll be fun, I swear. Come on. Come on."
(She begins dragging Susan by the feet.) 
Susan: "Why do you even care?" 
Edie: "I never said I cared. It's just...well, I...I guess I know what it's like to have your heart stomped on."

Susan: "Okay. All right. Give me a minute. I'll go change my clothes." 
Edie: "And don't forget to do something with that skanky hair. 

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