8 ways your childhood affects your lifestyle 童年影响你成年生活的 8 个方面

Do you ever wonder about how you turned out the way you are?     Or why some adults are more uptight thanothers while others are fun and delightful?     As cliche as it sounds, it all comes back to your childhood.     Depending on the households we grew up in,some of us may cringe at the thought while others may look starry-eyed as theygrow nostalgic.     Before we begin withthis video, we want to remind you that it's never too late to change yourfuture.     Even if certain past eventsput you in a stronger likelihood of outcomes.     Here are 8 ways your childhood affectsyour lifestyle.     1. If your parentswere highly strict, you may grow up to be codependent.     Did you have an overbearing mother whopicked out every outift for you?     Oran inflexible father who made you practise more sports instead of hanging outwith your friends?     Even if they meanwell, or believe that they are doing what's best for you, helicopter parentinghas harmful side-effects.     A big onebeing that you are more likely to grow up codependent.     As an adult, you might rely on yourpartner to take care of the chores or have trouble adapting to work life.     2. If your parents have a broken marriage,it changes your romantic demands.     It'slike Pam said from the office, when you're a kid, you assume your parents aresoulmates.     But unfortunately, thisisn't always the case.     Divorce ratesare sky-rocketing in America, now up to 40-50% of married couples are morelikely to end up in a divorce.     Ifyour parents separated, especially if the event happened during your earlychildhood, studies show that you're prone to having higher demands when itcomes to romantic relationships.     Youmay expect your partner to show a higher degree of morality, loyalty andcompassion so you can trust them better.     3. If your parents micromanaged you, you're more likely to developdepression.     OK, we've talked aboutcodependency, but depression is also a damaging side-effect of authoritarianparenting.     When you grow up withparents who do all the decision making for you, it makes you assume that you'renot competent enough to problem solve on your own.     Instead of listening to you and nurturingyou to learn from your mistakes, they often force decisions onto you.     Even ones that make you unhappy.     This can lead to feelings ofworthlessness, and low self-esteem which follow you into adulthood, manifestinginto depression.     4. If your parentswatched TV with you when you were a toddler instead of reading to you, it cansuppress your communication skills.     Wealways see those commercials of mothers reading to their babies, but thisadvertisment actually has value!     Itturns out that if your parents expose you to more television as a toddlerinstead of flipping through books, this can hinder your communication skills.     Studies have shown that when a mother andchild watch TV together, the mother makes fewer comments to the child whereasif she reads to her child, it promotes the child to ask questions, and a higherresponse rate from the mother.     5. Ifyou copied your parents a lot, you're more likely to be open to other cultures.     Did you often imitate your parents growingup?     Even if the actions didn't alwaysmake sense, you knew that they had some sort of purpose.     Researchers had an adult show a child howto open a box with sticks.     Eventhough it's more practical to use their fingers, when children imitate thebehaviors of their parents, their more likely to adapt to cultural norms.     That's because culture beliefs and customsmay not always been seen as practical and can even be outdated, but when theindividual is open to learning them, they also have the ability to be moreculturally aware.     6. If you werespanked as a child, you may become sneakier as an adult.     In some countries, it is now illegal tospank a child because it's seen as physical abuse.     Depending on the severity of spanking, ithas harmful side-effects ranging from academic problems to health ones, such asdying at a younger age of cancer, heart diseases and respiratory diseases.     But, did you know that you also more proneto being a sneaky adult?     AuthorDaniel Pink states that trying to influence a child's behaviour by offeringrewards and punishment does not always result in the desired behaviour.     In fact, children who were spanked maywork harder to avoid being punished.     7.If your parents have a drug or alcohol addiction, you're susceptible toperfectionism.     Do you know someonewho is serious, has a good work ethic, and is bit of a perfectionist?     Chances are they might have grown up beinga parent to their own parents.     When achild has parents who are alcoholics or drug addicts, they never had theopportunites to let loose and have fun.     Instead, they had to grow up faster than the other children and takecare of household responsibilities.     Onthe other hand, some children may adopt the habits of their parents which canmanifest into depression, anxiety, and feelings of worthlessness.     8. If you have a close relationship withyour father, you're more likely to enter healthier relationships.     We've all probably heard of the term"Daddy Issues" when someone grew up without a father around.     Unfortunately, research only continues toshow it's true.     One study examinedthe quality of father-child relationships among 3 groups.     Orphans, children of divorced parents, andchildren in stable families.     Resultsshowed that the children, whether they were male or female, with the closerelationship with their father was more common than those who didn't.     When we are able to love our parents andlearn to be patient with them, we are more likely to do the same for ourromantic partners.   

中文字幕为自动翻译，仅供参考。

你有没有想过你是怎么变成现在这样的?或者为什么有些成年人比其他人更保守，而有些人却很有趣、讨人喜欢?虽然听起来很老套，但这一切都要追溯到你的童年。根据我们成长的家庭，我们中的一些人可能会畏缩不前，而另一些人可能会随着怀旧而变得乐观。在我们开始这段视频之前，我们想提醒你，改变你的未来永远都不晚。即使过去的某些事件会让你更有可能出现结果。以下是童年影响你生活方式的8个方面。

1. 如果你的父母对你非常严格，你长大后可能会成为一个相互依赖的人。你有一个专横的妈妈为你挑选每一件衣服吗?或者是一个死板的父亲，让你多做运动，而不是和朋友出去玩?即使他们的本意是好的，或者相信他们所做的是对你最好的，直升机育儿也有有害的副作用。最重要的一点是，你们在成长过程中更有可能相互依赖。作为一个成年人，你可能会依赖你的伴侣来处理家务，或者在适应工作生活方面有困难。

2. 如果你父母的婚姻破裂，你的浪漫需求也会随之改变。就像帕姆在办公室说的，当你还是个孩子的时候，你会认为你的父母是灵魂伴侣。但不幸的是，情况并非总是如此。美国的离婚率正在急剧上升，现在高达40% -50%的已婚夫妇更有可能以离婚收场。如果你的父母离婚了，尤其是在你童年早期，研究表明，当涉及到浪漫关系时，你倾向于有更高的要求。你可能希望你的伴侣表现出更高程度的道德、忠诚和同情心，这样你就能更好地信任他们。

3.如果你的父母事无巨细地管理你，你更有可能患上抑郁症。好了，我们已经谈到了相互依赖，但抑郁也是独裁式父母的破坏性副作用。当你在父母为你做所有决定的环境中长大时，你会认为自己没有能力独自解决问题。他们不是倾听你，培养你从你的错误中学习，而是强迫你做决定。即使是那些让你不开心的事情。这会让你觉得自己毫无价值，自卑，这种感觉会一直伴随你长大成人，并表现为抑郁。

4. 在你蹒跚学步的时候，如果你的父母和你一起看电视，而不是给你读书，这可能会抑制你的沟通能力。我们总是看到妈妈给孩子读书的广告，但这个广告确实有价值!事实证明，如果你的父母在你蹒跚学步时让你多看电视，而不是翻阅书籍，这就会阻碍你的沟通能力。研究表明，当母亲和孩子一起看电视时，母亲对孩子的评论更少，而如果她读给孩子听，就会促使孩子问问题，母亲的回答率更高。

5. 如果你经常模仿你的父母，你就更有可能接受其他文化。你在成长过程中经常模仿你的父母吗?即使这些行为并不总是合理的，你也知道它们有某种目的。研究人员让一个成年人向一个孩子展示如何用棍子打开盒子。尽管用手指更实用，但当孩子模仿父母的行为时，他们更有可能适应文化规范。这是因为文化信仰和习俗可能并不总是被视为实用的，甚至可能过时，但当一个人愿意学习它们时，他们也有能力更有文化意识。

6. 如果你小时候被打过，长大后可能会变得更狡猾。在一些国家，现在打孩子是违法的，因为这被视为身体虐待。打屁股会产生从学术问题到健康问题等一系列有害副作用，如因癌症、心脏病和呼吸系统疾病而早逝，这取决于打屁股的严重程度。但是，你知道吗，你更倾向于成为一个鬼鬼祟祟的成年人?作者丹尼尔·平克(Daniel Pink)指出，试图通过奖励和惩罚来影响孩子的行为，并不总是会导致想要的行为。事实上，被打屁股的孩子可能会更努力地避免被惩罚。

7. 如果你的父母吸毒或酗酒，你很容易成为完美主义者。      你认识认真的、有良好的职业道德、有点完美主义的人吗?      他们很有可能是自己父母的父母。     如果一个孩子的父母是酗酒者或吸毒者，他们就没有机会放松和玩得开心。     相反，他们必须比其他孩子成长得更快，并承担家庭责任。     另一方面，一些孩子可能会采纳他们父母的习惯，这可以表现为抑郁、焦虑和感觉没有价值。    

8. 如果你和你的父亲关系亲密，你更有可能进入健康的关系。     我们可能都听说过“爸爸问题”这个词，指的是一个人在成长过程中没有父亲的陪伴。     不幸的是，研究只能继续证明这是正确的。     一项研究调查了3组父子关系的质量。     孤儿，离异父母的孩子，稳定家庭的孩子。     结果显示，与父亲关系密切的孩子，无论男女，比与父亲关系不密切的孩子更普遍。     当我们能够爱我们的父母并学会对他们耐心时，我们更有可能对我们的伴侣做同样的事情。