02-Chapter 2 THE SHADOW-kv

CHAPTER 2 THE SHADOW  

Mrs. Darling screamed, and, as if inanswer to a bell, the door opened, and Nana entered, returned from her eveningout. She growled and sprang at the boy, who leapt lightly through the window.Again Mrs. Darling screamed, this time in distress for him, for she thought hewas killed, and she ran down into the street to look for his little body, butit was not there; and she looked up, and in the black night she could seenothing but what she thought was a shooting star.

She returned to the nursery, and foundNana with something in her mouth, which proved to be the boy's shadow. As heleapt at the window Nana had closed it quickly, too late to catch him, but hisshadow had not had time to get out; slam went the window and snapped it off.

You may be sure Mrs. Darling examinedthe shadow carefully, but it was quite the ordinary kind.

Nana had no doubt of what was the bestthing to do with this shadow. She hung it out at the window, meaning "Heis sure to come back for it; let us put it where he can get it easily withoutdisturbing the children." But unfortunately Mrs. Darling could notleave it hanging out at the window, it looked so like the washing and loweredthe whole tone of the house. She thought of showing it to Mr. Darling, but hewas totting up winter great-coats for John and Michael, with a wet towel aroundhis head to keep his brain clear, and it seemed a shame to trouble him;besides, she knew exactly what he would say: "It all comes of having a dogfor a nurse." She decided to roll the shadow up and put it awaycarefully in a drawer, until a fitting opportunity came for telling herhusband. Ah me! The opportunity came a week later, on thatnever-to-be-forgotten Friday. Of course it was a Friday.

"I ought to have been speciallycareful on a Friday," she used to say afterwards to her husband, whileperhaps Nana was on the other side of her, holding her hand.

"No, no," Mr. Darling alwayssaid, "I am responsible for it all. I, George Darling, did it. MEA CULPA,MEA CULPA." He had had a classical education.

They sat thus night after nightrecalling that fatal Friday, till every detail of it was stamped on theirbrains and came through on the other side like the faces on a bad coinage.

"If only I had not accepted thatinvitation to dine at 27," Mrs. Darling said.

"If only I had not poured mymedicine into Nana's bowl," said Mr. Darling.

"If only I had pretended to likethe medicine," was what Nana's wet eyes said.

"My liking for parties,George." "My fatal gift of humour, dearest." "Mytouchiness about trifles, dear master and mistress." Then one or moreof them would break down altogether; Nana at the thought, "It's true, it'strue, they ought not to have had a dog for a nurse." Many a time itwas Mr. Darling who put the handkerchief to Nana's eyes.

"That fiend!" Mr. Daring wouldcry, and Nana's bark was the echo of it, but Mrs. Darling never upbraidedPeter; there was something in the right-hand corner of her mouth that wantedher not to call Peter names.

They would sit there in the emptynursery, recalling fondly every smallest detail of that dreadful evening. Ithad begun so uneventfully, so precisely like a hundred other evenings, withNana putting on the water for Michael's bath and carrying him to it on herback.

"I won't go to bed," he hadshouted, like one who still believed that he had the last word on the subject,"I won't, I won't. Nana, it isn't six o'clock yet. Oh dear, oh dear, Ishan't love you any more, Nana. I tell you I won't be bathed, I won't, Iwon't!" Then Mrs. Darling had come in, wearing her whiteevening-gown. She had dressed early because Wendy so loved to see her in herevening-gown, with the necklace George had given her. She was wearing Wendy'sbracelet on her arm; she had asked for the loan of it. Wendy loved to lend herbracelet to her mother.

She had found her two older childrenplaying at being herself and father on the occasion of Wendy's birth, and Johnwas saying: "I am happy to inform you, Mrs. Darling, that you are now amother," in just such a tone as Mr. Darling himself may have used on thereal occasion.

Wendy had danced with joy, just as thereal Mrs. Darling must have done.

Then John was born, with the extra pompthat he conceived due to the birth of a male, and Michael came from his bath toask to be born also, but John said brutally that they did not want any more.

Michael had nearly cried. "Nobodywants me," he said, and of course the lady in the evening-dress could notstand that.

"I do," she said, "I sowant a third child." "Boy or girl?" asked Michael, not toohopefully.

"Boy." Then he had leaptinto her arms. Such a little thing for Mr. and Mrs. Darling and Nana to recallnow, but not so little if that was to be Michael's last night in the nursery.

They go on with their recollections.

"It was then that I rushed in likea tornado, wasn't it?" Mr. Darling would say, scorning himself; and indeedhe had been like a tornado.

Perhaps there was some excuse for him.He, too, had been dressing for the party, and all had gone well with him untilhe came to his tie. It is an astounding thing to have to tell, but this man,though he knew about stocks and shares, had no real mastery of his tie.Sometimes the thing yielded to him without a contest, but there were occasionswhen it would have been better for the house if he had swallowed his pride andused a made-up tie.

This was such an occasion. He camerushing into the nursery with the crumpled little brute of a tie in his hand.

"Why, what is the matter, fatherdear?" "Matter!" he yelled; he really yelled. "Thistie, it will not tie." He became dangerously sarcastic. "Notround my neck! Round the bed-post! Oh yes, twenty times have I made it up roundthe bed-post, but round my neck, no! Oh dear no! It begs to be excused!” He thought Mrs.Darling was not sufficiently impressed, and he went on sternly, "I warnyou of this, mother, that unless this tie is round my neck we don't go out todinner to-night, and if I don't go out to dinner to-night, I never go tothe office again, and if I don't go to the office again, you and I starve, andour children will be flung into the streets." Even then Mrs. Darlingwas placid. "Let me try, dear," she said, and indeed that was what hehad come to ask her to do, and with her nice cool hands she tied his tie forhim, while the children stood around to see their fate decided. Some men wouldhave resented her being able to do it so easily, but Mr. Darling had far toofine a nature for that; he thanked her carelessly, at once forgot his rage, andin another moment was dancing round the room with Michael on his back.

"How wildly we romped!" saysMrs. Darling now, recalling it.

"Our last romp!" Mr. Darlinggroaned.

"O George, do you remember Michaelsuddenly said to me, 'How did you get to know me, mother?'" "Iremember!" "They were rather sweet, don't you think,George?" "And they were ours, ours! and now they aregone." The romp had ended with the appearance of Nana, and mostunluckily Mr. Darling collided against her, covering his trousers with hairs.They were not only new trousers, but they were the first he had ever had withbraid on them, and he had had to bite his lip to prevent the tears coming. Ofcourse Mrs. Darling brushed him, but he began to talk again about its being amistake to have a dog for a nurse.

"George, Nana is atreasure." "No doubt, but I have an uneasy feeling at times thatshe looks upon the children as puppies." 

"Oh no, dear one, I feel sure sheknows they have souls." "I wonder," Mr. Darling saidthoughtfully, "I wonder." It was an opportunity, his wife felt,for telling him about the boy. At first he pooh-poohed the story, but he becamethoughtful when she showed him the shadow.

"It is nobody I know," hesaid, examining it carefully, "but it does look ascoundrel." "We were still discussing it, you remember,"says Mr. Darling, "when Nana came in with Michael's medicine. You willnever carry the bottle in your mouth again, Nana, and it is all myfault." Strong man though he was, there is no doubt that he hadbehaved rather foolishly over the medicine. If he had a weakness, it was forthinking that all his life he had taken medicine boldly, and so now, whenMichael dodged the spoon in Nana's mouth, he had said reprovingly, "Be aman, Michael." "Won't; won't!" Michael cried naughtily.

Mrs. Darling left the room to get achocolate for him, and Mr. Darling thought this showed want of firmness.

"Mother, don't pamper him," hecalled after her. "Michael, when I was your age I took medicine without amurmur. I said, 'Thank you, kind parents, for giving me bottles to make wewell.'" He really thought this was true, and Wendy, who was now inher night-gown, believed it also, and she said, to encourage Michael,"That medicine you sometimes take, father, is much nastier, isn'tit?" "Ever so much nastier," Mr. Darling said bravely,"and I would take it now as an example to you, Michael, if I hadn't lostthe bottle." He had not exactly lost it; he had climbed in the deadof night to the top of the wardrobe and hidden it there. What he did not knowwas that the faithful Liza had found it, and put it back on his wash-stand.

"I know where it is, father,"Wendy cried, always glad to be of service. "I'll bring it," and shewas off before he could stop her. Immediately his spirits sank in the strangestway.

"John," he said, shuddering,"it's most beastly stuff. It's that nasty, sticky, sweetkind." "It will soon be over, father," John said cheerily,and then in rushed Wendy with the medicine in a glass.

"I have been as quick as Icould," she panted.

"You have been wonderfullyquick," her father retorted, with a vindictive politeness that was quitethrown away upon her. "Michael first," he said doggedly.

"Father first," said Michael,who was of a suspicious nature.

"I shall be sick, you know,"Mr. Darling said threateningly.

"Come on, father," said John.

"Hold your tongue, John," hisfather rapped out.

Wendy was quite puzzled. "I thoughtyou took it quite easily, father." "That is not the point,"he retorted. "The point is, that there is more in my glass that inMichael's spoon." His proud heart was nearly bursting. "And itisn't fair: I would say it though it were with my last breath; it isn't fair." "Father,I am waiting," said Michael coldly.

"It's all very well to say you arewaiting; so am I waiting." "Father's a cowardlycustard." "So are you a cowardly custard." "I'mnot frightened." "Neither am I frightened." "Well,then, take it." "Well, then, you take it." Wendy had asplendid idea. "Why not both take it at the sametime?" "Certainly," said Mr. Darling. "Are you ready,Michael?" Wendy gave the words, one, two, three, and Michael took hismedicine, but Mr. Darling slipped his behind his back.

There was a yell of rage from Michael,and "O father!" Wendy exclaimed.

"What do you mean by 'Ofather'?" Mr. Darling demanded. "Stop that row, Michael. I meant totake mine, but I—Imissed it.” It was dreadful the way all the threewere looking at him, just as if they did not admire him. "Look here, allof you," he said entreatingly, as soon as Nana had gone into the bathroom."I have just thought of a splendid joke. I shall pour my medicine intoNana's bowl, and she will drink it, thinking it is milk!" It was thecolour of milk; but the children did not have their father's sense of humour,and they looked at him reproachfully as he poured the medicine into Nana'sbowl. "What fun!" he said doubtfully, and they did not dare exposehim when Mrs. Darling and Nana returned.

"Nana, good dog," he said,patting her, "I have put a little milk into your bowl,Nana." Nana wagged her tail, ran to the medicine, and began lappingit. Then she gave Mr. Darling such a look, not an angry look: she showed himthe great red tear that makes us so sorry for noble dogs, and crept into herkennel.

Mr. Darling was frightfully ashamed ofhimself, but he would not give in. In a horrid silence Mrs. Darling smelt thebowl. "O George," she said, "it's yourmedicine!" "It was only a joke," he roared, while shecomforted her boys, and Wendy hugged Nana. "Much good," he saidbitterly, "my wearing myself to the bone trying to be funny in thishouse." And still Wendy hugged Nana. "That's right," heshouted. "Coddle her! Nobody coddles me. Oh dear no! I am only thebreadwinner, why should I be coddled—why, why, why!” "George,"Mrs. Darling entreated him, "not so loud; the servants will hearyou." Somehow that had got into the way of calling Liza the servants.

"Let them!" he answeredrecklessly.

"Bring in the whole world. But Irefuse to allow that dog to lord it in my nursery for an hourlonger." The children wept, and Nana ran to him beseechingly, but hewaved her back. He felt he was a strong man again. "In vain, invain," he cried; "the proper place for you is the yard, and there yougo to be tied up this instant." "George, George," Mrs.Darling whispered, "remember what I told you about thatboy." Alas, he would not listen. He was determined to show who wasmaster in that house, and when commands would not draw Nana from the kennel, helured her out of it with honeyed words, and seizing her roughly, dragged herfrom the nursery. He was ashamed of himself, and yet he did it. It was allowing to his too affectionate nature, which craved for admiration. When he hadtied her up in the back-yard, the wretched father went and sat in the passage,with his knuckles to his eyes.

In the meantime Mrs. Darling had put thechildren to bed in unwonted silence and lit their night-lights. They could hearNana barking, and John whimpered, "It is because he is chaining her up inthe yard," but Wendy was wiser.

"That is not Nana's unhappybark," she said, little guessing what was about to happen; "that isher bark when she smells danger." Danger! "Are you sure,Wendy?" "Oh, yes." Mrs. Darling quivered and went tothe window. It was securely fastened. She looked out, and the night waspeppered with stars. They were crowding round the house, as if curious to seewhat was to take place there, but she did not notice this, nor that one or twoof the smaller ones winked at her. Yet a nameless fear clutched at her heartand made her cry, "Oh, how I wish that I wasn't going to a party to-night!” Even Michael,already half asleep, knew that she was perturbed, and he asked, "Cananything harm us, mother, after the night-lights are lit?” "Nothing, precious," she said; "they are theeyes a mother leaves behind her to guard her children." She went frombed to bed singing enchantments over them, and little Michael flung his armsround her. "Mother," he cried, "I'm glad of you." Theywere the last words she was to hear from him for a long time.

No.27 was only a few yards distant, butthere had been a slight fall of snow, and Father and Mother Darling pickedtheir way over it deftly not to soil their shoes. They were already the onlypersons in the street, and all the stars were watching them. Stars arebeautiful, but they may not take an active part in anything, they must justlook on for ever. It is a punishment put on them for something they did so longago that no star now knows what it was. So the older ones have becomeglassy-eyed and seldom speak (winking is the star language), but the littleones still wonder. They are not really friendly to Peter, who had a mischievousway of stealing up behind them and trying to blow them out; but they are sofond of fun that they were on his side to-night, and anxious to get thegrown-ups out of the way. So as soon as the door of 27 closed on Mr. and Mrs.Darling there was a commotion in the firmament, and the smallest of all thestars in the Milky Way screamed out: "Now, Peter!"