人虽脑残，志比金坚

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My grandma would write her entire message in the subject line and then in the body of the email she'd write, "see above."

我奶奶会把所有的信息写在标题栏，然后在正文部分写——“往上看”。

subject n. 主题

body n. 正文

"Sorry sir, I can't come into work today; I'm in bed with a nasty clown." I meant to say "cold."

“老板，恐怕我今天不能来工作了，我现在和一个流氓小丑一起躺在被子里。”我其实想说，“我感冒了。”

nasty adj.下流的

clown n. 小丑

On a business trip I tried to message my wife"Tell the kids I love them."It autocorrected to "Tell the kids I love men."

有一次出差，我想要给老婆发短信说：“告诉孩子们，爸比爱他们。”结果系统自动纠错成“告诉孩子们，老子爱男人。”

autocorrect v. 自动纠正

I secretly liked my friend's boyfriend. He sent me a birthday e-card. I opened it 36 times. It notified him each time.

我暗恋着我一个朋友的男朋友。一天，他发了一张电子的生日贺卡给我。我打开了36次，重点是，每一次他都会收到提醒信息。

e-card 电子卡片

notify v. 通知

Emailed my boss, Stuart, and it autocorrected to, "Thanks, I’ll take care of it tomorrow, stupid."

给我上司斯图尔特先生发邮件，系统自动纠错，“好的，我明天会来处理的，你个笨蛋！”

Stuart 人名，斯图尔特

Stupid n. 笨蛋

My co-worker sent an email to everyone asking for his help to get his wife turned on. He meant to say "Wi-Fi."

我同事给所有人群发邮件，请求大家帮忙，把他老婆给打开。他其实是想说“把Wi-Fi给我开了。”

turn on 打开