秘密花园 - 06 柯林害怕了

Because it rained all the next week，Mary went to talk to Colin every day instead of visiting the garden．But she woke early one morning to see the sun shining into her room，and she ran out to the secret garden at once．She did not even wait to have her breakfast．It was beautifully sunny and warm，and a thousand more shoots were pushing their way out of the ground．Dickon was already there，digging hard，with the crow and a young fox beside him．

　　‘Have you seen the robin？’he asked Mary．The little bird was flying busily backwards and forwards as fast as he could，carrying pieces of dry grass．

　　‘He's building a nest！’whispered Mary．They watched the robin for a moment．Then Mary said，

　　‘I must tell you something．You probably know about Colin Craven，don't you？Well，I've met him，and I'm going to help him to get better．’

　　‘That's good news．’There was a big smile on Dickon's honest face．‘We all knew he was ill．’

　　‘He's afraid he'll have a crooked back like his father．I think that's what's making him ill．’

　　‘Perhaps we can bring him here and let him rest under the trees．That'll do him good．That's what we'll do．’

　　They had a lot of gardening and planning to do and Mary did not have time to visit Colin that day．When she came back to the house in the evening，Martha told her that the servants had had trouble with Colin．

　　‘He's been very badtempered all afternoon with all of us，because you didn't come，miss．’

　　‘Well，I was busy．He'll have to learn not to be so selfish，’replied Mary coldly．She forgot how selfish she had been when she was ill in India．‘I'll go and see him now．’

　　When she went into his room，he was lying in bed，looking tired．He did not turn to look at her．

　　‘What's the matter with you？’she asked crossly．

　　‘My back aches and my head hurts．Why dldn't you come this afternoon？’

　　‘I was working in the garden with Dickon．’

　　‘I won't let that boy come to the garden if you stay with him instead of talking to me！’

　　Mary suddenly became very angry．‘If you send Dickon away，I'll never come into this room again！’

　　‘You'll have to，if I say so．I'll make the servants bring you in here．’

　　‘Oh，will you，prince！But no one can make me talk to you．I won't look at you．I'll stare at the floor！’

　　‘You selfish girl！’cried Colin．

　　‘You're more selfish than I am．You're the most selfish boy I've ever met！’

　　‘I'm not as selfish as your fine Dickon！He keeps you playing outside when he knows I'm ill and alone！’

　　Mary had never been so furious．‘Dickon is nicer than any other boy in the world！He's like an angel！’

　　‘An angel！Don't make me laugh！He's just a poor country boy，with holes in his shoes！’

　　‘He's a thousand times better than you are！’

　　Colin had never argued with anyone like himself in his life，and in fact it was good for him．But now he was beginning to feel sorry for himself．

　　‘I'm always ill，’he said，and started to cry．‘I'm sure my back is a bit crooked．And I'm going to die！’

　　‘No，you're not！’said Mary crossly．

　　Colin opened his eyes very wide．Nobody had said that to him before．He was angry，but a bit pleased at the same time．‘What do you mean？You know I'm going to die！Everybody says I'm going to die！’

　　‘I don't believe it！’said Mary in her most disagreeable voice．‘You just say that to make people feel sorry for you．You're too horrid to die！’

　　Colin forgot about his painful back and sat up in bed．‘Get out of the room at once！’he shouted，and threw a book at her．

　　‘I'm going，’Mary shouted in reply，‘and I won't come back！’The door banged shut behind her．

　　When she reached her own room，she had decided never to tell him her great secret．‘He can stay in his room and die if he 66wants！’she thought．But soon she began to remember how ill he had been，and how frightened he was，frightened that one day his back would become as crooked as his father's．‘Perhaps…perhaps I'll go back and see him tomorrow！’

　　That night she was woken by the most terrible screams that she had ever heard．Servants were opening and shutting doors and running about．

　　‘It's Colin！’thought Mary．‘He'll go on screaming until he makes himself really ill！How selfish he is！Somebody should stop him！’

　　Just then Martha ran into the room．‘We don't know what to do！’she cried．‘He likes you，miss！Come and see if you can make him calmer，please！’

　　‘Well，I'm very cross with him，’said Mary，and jumped out of bed．‘I'm going to stop him！’

　　‘That's right，’said Martha．‘He needs someone like you，to argue with．It'll give him something new to think about．’

　　Mary ran into Colin's room，right up to his bed．

　　‘Stop screaming！’she shouted furiously．‘Stop at once！I hate you！Everybody hates you！You'll die if you go on screaming like this，and I hope you will！’

　　The screams stopped immediately．This was the first time that anyone had spoken so angrily to Colin，and he was shocked．But he went on crying quietly to himself．

　　‘My back's becoming crooked，I can feel it！I know I'm going to die！’Large tears ran down his face．

　　‘Don't be stupid！’cried Mary．‘There's nothing the matter with your horrid back！Martha，come here and help me look at his back！’

　　Martha and Mrs Medlock were standing at the door，staring at Mary，their mouths half open．They both looked very frightened．Martha came forward to help，and Miss Mary looked carefully at Colin's thin white back，up and down．Her face was serious and angry at the same time．The room was very quiet．

　　‘There's nothing wrong with your back！’she said at last．‘Nothing at all！It's as straight as mine！’

　　Only Colin knew how important those crossly spoken，childish words were．All his life he had been afraid to ask about his back，and his terrible fear had made him ill．Now an angry little girl told him his back was straight，and he believed her．He was no longer afraid．

　　They were both calmer now．He gave Mary his hand．‘I thinkI'm almost sure I will live，if we can go out in the garden together sometimes．I'm very tired now．Will you stay with me until I go to sleep？’

　　The servants went out very quietly．

　　‘I'll tell you all about the secret garden，’whispered Mary．‘I think it's full of roses and beautiful flowers．Birds like making their nests there because it's so quiet and safe．And perhaps our robin…

　　But Colin was already asleep．

　　The next day Mary met Dickon as usual in the secret garden，and told him about Colin．Mary loved Dickon's Yorkshire dialect and was trying to learn it herself．She spoke a little now．

　　‘We mun get poor Colin out here in th'sunshine—an’we munnot lose no time about it！’

　　Dickon laughed．‘Well done！I didn't know you could speak Yorkshire！You're right．We must bring Colin to the garden as soon as we can．’

　　So that afternoon she went to see Colin．

　　‘I'm sorry I said I'd send Dickon away，’he said．‘I hated you when you said he was like an angel！’

　　‘Well，he's a funny kind of angel，but he understands wild animals better than anyone．’Suddenly，Mary knew that this was the right moment to tell him．She caught hold of his hands．‘Colin，this is important．Can you keep a secret？’

　　‘Yes—yes！’he whispered excitedly．‘What is it？’

　　‘We've found the door into the secret garden！’

　　‘Oh Mary！Will I live long enough to see it？’

　　‘Of course you will！Don't be stupid！’said Mary crossly．But it was a very natural thing to say，and they both laughed．

　　Colin told Mrs Medlock and the doctor that he wanted to go out in his wheelchair．At first the doctor was worried the boy would get too tired，but when he heard that Dickon would push the wheelchair，he agreed．

　　‘Dickon's a sensible boy，’he told Colin．‘But don't forget—’

　　‘I've told you，I want to forget that I'm ill，’said Colin in his prince's voice．‘Don't you understand？It's because my cousin makes me forget that I feel better when I'm with her．’

　　由于接下来下了一个星期的雨，玛丽没有去花园，而是每天去看柯林。可一天早晨她很早就醒了，看见阳光洒进她的房间，她立即跑出去到秘密花园，连早餐也没来得及吃。天气晴朗，阳光明媚，无数的嫩牙拱出地面，狄肯已经在那儿了，正起劲地挖着土，他的身边有一只乌鸦和一只小狐狸。

　　“看见知更鸟了吗？”他问玛丽。小鸟正忙碌地飞前飞后衔着枯叶。

　　“它在筑巢呢！”玛丽低声道。他们看了一会儿，然后玛丽说：

　　“我得告诉你一件事。你听说过柯林·克莱文，是吗？我见过他了，而且我要帮助他好起来。”

　　“这可是好消息，”狄肯质朴的脸上露出了开心的笑容。“我们都知道他有病。”

　　“他是害怕会像他父亲那样驼背，我看这就是他生病的原因。”

　　“也许我们可以带他来这儿让他在树下休息。那会对他有好处。而那正是我们要做的。”

　　他们忙着在花园里修整、种花，所以玛丽一整天没时间去看柯林。当她晚上回到房间时，玛莎告诉她用人们在柯林那儿惹了麻烦了。

　　“他整个下午冲我们所有人发脾气，就因为你没去看他，小姐。”

　　“哦，我很忙。他得学着别这么自私。”玛丽冷冷地说。她忘了她自己在印度生病时有多自私了。“我现在就去看他。”

　　她走进房间时，他正躺在床上，显得很疲倦，没有扭头看她。

　　“你怎么啦？”她不太耐烦地问道。

　　“我后背疼，头也疼。下午你为什么没来？”

　　“我在花园里跟狄肯一起干活儿。”

　　“要是你净跟他在一起不来跟我说话，我就不许那个孩子到花园里来！”

　　玛丽当即就生气了。“你要让狄肯走的话，我就再也不到这儿来了！”

　　“你必须得来，因为我说了让你来，我会叫用人把你叫来。”

　　“哦，是吗？王子！可是没人能让我跟你说话呀！我会连看都不看你，就盯着地板！”

　　“你自私！”柯林叫嚷道。

　　“你比我自私多了。你是我见过的最自私的人！”

　　“我可不像你可爱的狄肯那么自私，他明知我一个人在生病，却让你一直在外面陪着他玩！”

　　玛丽从来没生过这么大的气，“狄肯比世界上任何男孩都好！他像个天使！”

　　“一个天使！别逗了！他不过是个乡下的穷孩子。鞋底还漏着窟窿！”

　　“他比你好上一千倍！”

　　柯林长这么大从没跟自己年龄相仿的人吵过架，这实际上对他有好处。可这会儿他觉得自己可怜极了。

　　“我老是生病，”他一边说一边哭起来。“我肯定我的背有点驼了，而且我就快死了！”

　　“不，你不会的！”玛丽不耐烦了。

　　柯林睁大了眼睛，以前从来没人这么说过他。他生气了，可同时又有点高兴。“你什么意思？你知道我就要死了！每个人都说我快死了！”

　　“我不信！”玛丽说，声音很刺耳。“你这么说只是想要别人可怜你。你怕死，你不敢去死！”

　　柯林忘了背疼的事，从床上坐起来，“马上从这儿滚出去！”他吼道，把一本书朝她扔过来。

　　“我这就走。”玛丽大声说，“我再也不会来了！”她撞上门走了。

　　回到自己的房间后，她下决心永远不告诉他自己的大秘密。“他可以呆在他的房间里，要死就死吧！”她想。可马上她又想起他病得那么厉害，他是那么恐惧，担心有一天他的背会像父亲一样驼。“也许……也许明天我会回去看看！”

　　这天夜里她被从未听过的尖叫声惊醒。用人们开门又关门，跑来跑去。

　　“是柯林！”玛丽想。“他会不停地叫下去，直到真弄出病来！他多么自私啊！该有人去制止他！”

　　这时玛莎跑进她的房里，“我们不知道该怎么办！”她叫着。“他喜欢你，小姐！去看看你能不能让他安静下来，好吗？”

　　“好吧，我烦死他了，”玛丽说着从床上跳下来，“我得去制止他！”

　　“没错，”玛莎说。“他需要像你这样的人，一起吵吵嘴，这能给他点新鲜的东西让他去琢磨。”

　　玛丽跑到他的房间，径直走到床前。

　　“别叫啦！”她气冲冲地喊道，“马上停住！我讨厌你！人人都讨厌你！你再这么喊下去就会死的，我希望你死！”

　　喊叫声立即停住了。这可是第一次有人这么气愤地对柯林说话，他被吓坏了。不过他还是在小声哭着。

　　“我的背开始驼了，我能感觉到！我知道我就要死了！”大颗的泪珠从他的脸上流了下来。

　　“别傻了！”玛丽叫道。“这跟你可怕的背没关系！玛莎，过来让我看看他的背！”

　　玛莎和梅洛太太都站在门边，瞪着玛丽，嘴巴半张着。看来她们都给吓坏了。玛莎走过来帮忙，玛丽小姐上上下下仔细看了柯林那消瘦苍白的脊背，神色严肃，同时又很生气。房间里很静。

　　“你的脊背一点毛病也没有！”她最后说道。“什么也没有，像我的背一样直！”

　　只有柯林明白这些带着怒气说出的孩子气的话有多么重要。他长这么大一直都不敢问起自己的脊背，而他的恐惧总是让他病歪歪的。现在这个愤怒的小姑娘告诉他，说他的脊背是直的，而他相信她。他再也不怕了。

　　他们俩这会儿都安静多了，他把手伸给玛丽。“我想——要是我们哪天能到花园里去的话，我几乎可以肯定我会活下去的。我现在很累了，你能等我睡着后再走吗？”

　　用人们悄悄地退了出去。

　　“我要告诉你秘密花园的事，”玛丽低声说。“我想里面满是玫瑰和美丽的花儿，鸟儿喜欢在里面筑巢是因为那儿宁静、安全。而且也许我们的知更鸟……”

　　可柯林已经睡着了。

　　第二天玛丽像往常一样在秘密花园里见到狄肯，她告诉他柯林的事。玛丽喜欢狄肯的约克郡口音，所以努力在学他，她现在已经能说一点了。

　　“我们得把可怜的柯林弄到这儿来晒晒太阳——我们不能再耽搁了！”

　　狄肯笑了，“你说的不错呀！我还不知道你会说约克郡的话！没错，我们得尽快带柯林到花园里来。”

　　于是下午她来看柯林。

　　“很抱歉我说过让狄肯走的话，”他说。“你说他像个天使，我就讨厌你了。”

　　“嗯，他是那种有趣的天使，而且他比任何人都了解那些动物。”这时玛丽觉得是告诉他的时候了，她握住他的手，“柯林，这很重要，你能保守秘密吗？”

　　“能——能！”他小声兴奋地说道。“是什么？”

　　“我们找到了进秘密花园的门！”

　　“哦，玛丽！我能活着看看它吗？”

　　“当然能！别傻了！”玛丽不耐烦了，可这么说又非常自然，于是两人都笑了。

　　柯林告诉梅洛太太和医生他想坐轮椅出去。开始医生担心他会累着，可当他听狄肯说用轮椅推着他时，他同意了。

　　“狄肯是个懂事的孩子，”他对柯林说。“但是别忘了——”

　　“我告诉过你，我想忘了我有病，”柯林用他那王子般的口气说。“你不明白吗？就是因为我表妹让我忘掉我有病，跟她在一起我才觉得好些的。”