试听180秒13.2 《爱的五种语言》：最终我选择去原谅(讲解版下)

1. erase抹除，擦掉

eraser橡皮

erase的同义词：remove、delete，都是抹除，删掉的意思。

2. confess坦白，承认

常见的搭配就是confess that，后面跟的是从句，就是我们想要坦白的事实。

它是一个及物动词，所以我们可以用confess it。

3. ask for寻求请求

We can ask for forgiveness是我们可以寻求原谅

in the future在以后的日子里

act differently就是做出不一样的行为，做出改变的意思。

4. Having confessed my failure and asked forgiveness, I can do nothing more to mitigate the hurt it may have caused my spouse. 我能做的只有承认我的失误并寻求原谅，除此之外，做什么也无法减轻我的行为给ta可能带来的伤害。

Having confessed，这种ing形式，它的主语就是后面半句的主语

confess my failure就是承认错误

ask forgiveness就是请求原谅

5. When I have been wronged by my spouse就是被我的伴侣冤枉wrong这个形容词作为动词就是这样的用法。

6. painfully充满痛苦地

pain名词，痛苦，

painful 形容词，痛苦的

painfully 副词，是痛苦地

7. request forgiveness 恳求我的原谅

 request请求恳求. 它可以作动词也可以作名词。这边是作为动词。

request permission 征得同意

搭配:

非常礼貌地请求你politely request

正式地请求 formally request

很焦急地请求 urgently request。

8. I have the option of我有什么样的选择

option是选择的意思

9. seek to试图做什么

10. Pay her back，报复她

11.  I am making myself the judge and her the felon. 我把自己当成了法官，把他当成了罪犯。

这是用了一个省略的结构，它的全称是：

I am making myself the judge and I am making her the felon. 

但是这边and前后的 I am making是一个相同的结构，所以在后半句可以直接把它省略。

12. choose to do sth.就是选择做什么事情

restore就是复原复苏的意思

13. Intimacy becomes impossible. 亲密不再可能。

这句话再次出现了我们在课程中反复强调的现象，当有个很长的句子，尤其是几个很长的句子之后，一定后面得跟一个短句调整一下节奏。

intimacy是亲密的意思。

14. If, however, I choose to forgive, intimacy can be restored. 如果我选择了原谅，那么亲密便会复苏。

一个插入语，就是说把however放在if后面，这样子会使句子一下子生动很多。 

完整版

Love doesn't keep a score of wrongs. Love doesn't bring up past failures. None of us is perfect. In marriage we do not always do the right thing. We have sometimes done and said hurtful things to our spouses. We cannot erase the past. We can only confess it and agree that it was wrong. We can ask for forgiveness and try to act differently in the future. Having confessed my failure and asked forgiveness, I can do nothing more to mitigate the hurt it may have caused my spouse. When I have been wronged by my spouse and she has painfully confessed it and requested forgiveness, I have the option of justice or forgiveness. If I choose justice and seek to pay her back or make her pay for her wrongdoing, I am making myself the judge and her the felon. Intimacy becomes impossible. If, however, I choose to forgive, intimacy can be restored. Forgiveness is the way of love.” 

-- Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

“爱一个人，就不要把ta做错的事情都记得清清楚楚；爱一个人，就不要把过去的不足总翻出来重提。没有谁是完美的。在婚姻里，我们并不总能把每件事都做对。有的时候我们做的事情、说的话会伤害到我们的伴侣。我们无法抹除过去，只能说出自己的错误并勇于承认。我们可以寻求原谅，并在以后的日子里做出改变。我能做的只有承认我的失误并寻求原谅，除此之外，做什么也无法减轻我的行为给ta可能带来的伤害。如果我被我的伴侣冤枉，而她心怀痛苦地承认了自己的过错，并恳求我的原谅，我可以选择正义，也可以选择宽恕。如果我选择了正义，并让她偿还自己的过失，我就把自己变成了法官，把她视为了罪人。这种情况下，亲密不再可能滋生。而如果我选择了原谅，那么亲密便会复苏。宽恕是爱一个人的正确方式。”

——盖瑞•查普曼，《爱的五种语言：如何向你的伴侣表示衷心的承诺》

分解版

Love doesn't keep a score of wrongs.

“爱一个人，就不要把ta做错的事情都记得清清楚楚；

Love doesn't bring up past failures.

爱一个人，就不要把过去的不足总翻出来重提。

None of us is perfect.

没有谁是完美的。

In marriage we do not always do the right thing.

在婚姻里，我们并不总能把每件事都做对。

We have sometimes done and said hurtful things to our spouses.

有的时候我们做的事情、说的话会伤害到我们的伴侣。

We cannot erase the past.

我们无法抹除过去。

We can only confess it and agree that it was wrong.

只能说出自己的错误并勇于承认。

We can ask for forgiveness and try to act differently in the future.

我们可以寻求原谅，并在以后的日子里做出改变。

Having confessed my failure and asked forgiveness,

除了承认我的失误并寻求原谅，

I can do nothing more

做什么也无法

to mitigate the hurt it may have caused my spouse.

减轻我的行为给ta可能带来的伤害。

Having confessed my failure and asked forgiveness, I can do nothing more to mitigate the hurt it may have caused my spouse.

我能做的只有承认我的失误并寻求原谅，除此之外，做什么也无法减轻我的行为给ta可能带来的伤害。

When I have been wronged by my spouse

如果我被我的伴侣冤枉，

and she has painfully confessed it and requested forgiveness,

而她心怀痛苦地承认了自己的过错，并恳求我的原谅，

I have the option of justice or forgiveness.

我可以选择正义，也可以选择宽恕。

When I have been wronged by my spouse and she has painfully confessed it and requested forgiveness, I have the option of justice or forgiveness.

如果我被我的伴侣冤枉，而她心怀痛苦地承认了自己的过错，并恳求我的原谅，我可以选择正义，也可以选择宽恕。

If I choose justice and seek to pay her back

如果我选择了正义，

or make her pay for her wrongdoing,

并让她偿还自己的过失，

I am making myself the judge and her the felon.

我就把自己变成了法官，把她视为了罪人。

If I choose justice and seek to pay her back or make her pay for her wrongdoing, I am making myself the judge and her the felon.

如果我选择了正义，并让她偿还自己的过失，我就把自己变成了法官，把她视为了罪人。

Intimacy becomes impossible.

这种情况下，亲密不再可能滋生。

If, however, I choose to forgive,

而如果我选择了原谅，

intimacy can be restored.

那么亲密便会复苏。

If, however, I choose to forgive, intimacy can be restored.

而如果我选择了原谅，那么亲密便会复苏。

Forgiveness is the way of love.” 

宽恕是爱一个人的正确方式。”