【中文版 418】丹尼尔·戈尔曼：用冥想提高情商

用冥想提高情商

【Background】

【背景介绍】

Strengthen Emotional Intelligence with Meditation, with Daniel Goleman, Psychologist and Author

In recent years, meditation has gone so rapidly from subculture to mainstream that some might be tempted to dismiss it as a passing fad. The fact is that two core practices of the new wave of meditation apps and schools, mindfulness and lovingkindness meditation, date back thousands of years. And both have been clinically shown to have beneficial effects on self-awareness and compassion for others, two core dimensions of emotional intelligence.

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近年来，冥想已经从亚文化迅速发展到主流文化，以至于有些人可能会无视它，将它看作一种过时的时尚。正念冥想和慈爱冥想是近来兴起的冥想App和冥想学校浪潮的核心实践。这两者的起源可以追溯到数千年前。临床上显示，它们对情商的核心方面，即自我认知和同情心，起着有益作用。

今天我们请到了丹尼尔·戈尔曼。他是一名心理学家和作家。在今天的课程中，他将为我们讲解如何用冥想提高自己的情商。

【Course】

【课程】

Boost calmness

Let’s look at the crosswalk between how meditation helps emotional intelligence and what this means for outstanding leadership. Particularly if you do a meditation like mindfulness, that helps you with self-awareness and self-management. And then you do a meditation like compassion, loving-kindness, where you think about helping other people. That turns out to increase your empathy and that will help in your relationship competencies, too.

That doesn’t mean you don’t have some learning left to get better at each of those competencies, but it does help to some degree across the board.

增强保持冷静的能力

让我们一起见识一下冥想的力量。尤其是当你运用正念冥想来帮助提升自我意识和自我管理时，冥想是如何影响情商的，冥想对于杰出的领导力而言又意味着什么呢？当你进行慈悲冥想或慈爱冥想，想着帮助其他人时，这能增加你的同理心，也会帮助提升你在人际关系中的能力。这并不是说你不再需要学习去提高每一项能力，但冥想在某种程度上确实对全面发展有所帮助。

So take emotional self-control. The data on meditation shows that even from the beginning, the practice of mindfulness or any other kind of meditation, TM, you name it, helps people be less reactive under stress. What that means is that their amygdala, the very trigger point for the flight or fight or freeze response, is calmer. This means that you’re better able to take stress, upsetting situations, business crises, whatever it may be, and stay calm and be clear. And if you do get upset, you’re more likely to recover more quickly. So that’s optimal for a leader, and from the point of view of emotional intelligence it means you have excellent emotional self-control.

就拿自我情绪控制举例吧。与冥想有关的数据显示，不论是正念冥想、超越冥想还是其他任何一种你能列举出来的冥想，在一开始就能帮助人们减轻压力下的应激反应。也就是说，冥想者的杏仁核会更冷静。杏仁核是调节情绪的脑部组织，是逃跑、战斗或僵硬反应的触发点。这意味不论是面对混乱场景、商业危机还是其他任何情况，一个人都能更好地应对压力，保持镇静和头脑清醒。而且就算你真的被打击到了，你也能更快恢复过来。这对一位领导者来说至关重要，而且从情商角度来说，这体现了你出色的自我情绪控制能力。

Boost compassion

Perhaps the most startling finding for meditation in beginners comes with what’s called compassion or loving-kindness meditation. This is a practice that often accompanies the mindfulness of the breath, for example, that people will often do at the end of a session. They bring to mind people who have been kind to them. They think of themselves, people they love, people they know, everyone everywhere, and wish them well - may they be safe, happy, healthy, free from suffering. And it turns out the repetition of those phrases is psychoactive. It actually changes the brain and how you feel right from the get-go. We find, for example, that people who do this meditation who’ve just started doing it actually are kinder. They’re more likely to help someone in need, they’re more generous. And they’re happier. It turns out that the brain areas that make us want to help someone that we care about also connect with the circuitry for feeling good. So it feels good to be kind. And all of that shows up very early, in just a few hours of total practice of loving-kindness or compassion meditation. So we feel that the brain is somehow biologically prepared to learn to love better. The brain area that becomes stronger in its activity is the same as a parent’s love for a child. It’s the mammalian caretaking circuitry - we share it with all other mammals. And in humans it’s extremely important for the third of three kinds of empathy. There’s empathy that allows you to understand better how someone thinks, to take their perspective. That lets you be a good communicator. There’s empathy where you connect emotionally, you feel what the other person feels. Immediately you sense in your own body what’s going on in the other person. This allows for rapport and chemistry. It’s also very important. But the third kind of empathy is what’s called empathic concern. It’s the feeling of caring about another person, wanting to help them. It’s the basis of compassion. You can have the first two and not be particularly concerned or caring. But if you have all three, then you’ve got the whole package of empathy. And we find that loving-kindness meditation strengthens that third both in terms of how you behave, how you feel, and what’s happening in the brain.

增强同理心

对于冥想初学者来说，最令人目瞪口呆的发现莫过于慈悲冥想或说是慈爱冥想了。这一冥想常出现在最后环节，往往伴随着专注的呼吸练习。它让人想起曾经友善对待过我们的人。人们会想起他们自己、自己爱的人、自己认识的人及其所有地方的所有人，并在内心祝福这些人安然无恙，幸福健康，远离烦恼。这些反复念及的词语被证实能作用于精神。它能改变大脑和你从一开始的感觉。比如说，我们发现，刚开始练习这种冥想的人的确会更善良，他们更可能去帮助那些需要帮助的人，他们也更慷慨和幸福。事实证明，大脑有一块区域会让我们想帮助自己关心的人。同时这块区域也与负责让人感觉良好的神经回路相连。也就是说，保持善良让人感觉良好。所有一切见效都很快，就在慈悲冥想或慈爱冥想练习后的几小时内。莫明其妙地，我们会感到大脑仿佛在生理上已经做好了准备，学习如何更好去爱。大脑某一区域的活动会变得更为强烈。这一区域也负责激发父母对孩子的爱。这是哺乳动物大脑中负责关爱照看的神经回路，是我们与所有其他哺乳动物共有的一个领域。对人类来说，三种同理心中的第三种尤为重要。有了认知同理心，你可以更好地理解别人的思考方式，并接纳他们的观点。这能让你成为一个更出色的沟通者。有了情绪同理心，你可以建立情感上的联系，你可以切实体会他人的感受，你能在第一时间对他人感同身受。前两类同理心带来了融洽的交往关系和奇妙的化学反应。它们很重要。不过第三种同理心，即所谓的共情关注，更不容忽视。这是一种在乎关心他人，想帮助他们的感觉。这是同情心的基础。你可以具备前两种同理心，而不必显现出特别的关注或关心。但是，如果你同时具备三种，你才真正拥有了完整的同理心。而且我们发现，慈爱冥想能增强共情关注的能力，改善你的行为举止、感觉和大脑变化。

【Summary】

【总结】

Boost calmness

•Of the Four Domains of Emotional Intelligence, mindfulness meditation can help with self-awareness and self-management. Loving-kindness meditation can help with social awareness (empathy) and relationship management.

•Research shows that mindfulness meditation can dramatically improve emotional self- control. It helps people be less reactive under stress. When people do get upset, they’re more likely to recover more quickly.

Boost compassion

•Research shows that loving-kindness meditation—bringing to mind loved ones and wishing them well—makes people kinder, more generous, and happier.

•Loving-kindness meditation triggers the mammalian caretaking circuitry—the same biological wiring that drives parental love.

•Our caretaking circuitry is important for the third of three kinds of empathy:

◦1. Cognitive empathy: Taking the other person’s perspective

◦2. Emotional empathy: Feeling what the other person feels

◦3. Empathic concern: Caring about the other person and wanting to help him or her

•We can have the first two but not be concerned or caring. With all three, we have the full

package of empathy.

在这节课中，丹尼尔·戈尔曼为我们介绍了冥想是如何帮助我们提高情商的。

一、增强保持冷静的能力

• 在情商的四大要素中，正念冥想能增强自我意识和自我管理。慈爱冥想能提高社会意识（同理心）和人际关系管理能力。

• 研究表明，正念冥想能极大地提升自我情绪控制能力。它能减少人们在压力之下的应激反应。当人们变得沮丧不安时，正念冥想也能帮助他们更快恢复。

二、增强同理心

• 研究表明，慈爱冥想让人更善良、更慷慨和更幸福。因为慈爱冥想要求我们回忆自己爱的人，并在心里给予他们祝福。

• 慈爱冥想会激活哺乳动物大脑中负责关爱照看的神经回路——和负责激活父母之爱的神经回路是同样的。

• 在三类同理心中，负责关爱照看的神经回路对第三种同理心十分重要。

◦1. 认知同理心：站在他人立场

◦2. 情绪同理心：体会他人感受

◦3. 共情关注：关心在乎他人并想要帮助他们

• 我们可以具备前两种同理心，而不必显现出特别的关注或关心。但是同时具备三种，我们才算拥有完整的同理心。

本节目英文版音频和视频均由美国Big Think Edge 独家授权，中文版由喜马拉雅制作播出。感谢收听，我们下集节目再见！