急求英语经典笑话(小学水平)

The New Teacher



George comes from school on the first of September.



"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.



"I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."



新老师



9月1日， 乔治放学回到家里。



"乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗?" 妈妈问。



"妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。"



Two Birds



Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?



Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.



Teacher: Please tell us.



Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.



两只鸟



老师: 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗?



学生:我指不出，但我知道答案。



老师:请说说看。



学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。



Excuse for Speeding



Excuse for Speeding

Harry and Lloyd were speeding down the road. A police car pulled them over.



〃Why on earth were you driving so fast?〃 the policeman yelled.



〃Our brakes are no good-so we wanted to get there before we had an accident!〃



超速的理由



哈里与劳埃德超速行驶，一辆警车拦住了他们。



“你们为什么开那么快?”警官喊道。



“我们的刹车不好，因此我们想在发生事故前赶紧到达目的地。”



Send the Bill to My Father



Doctor: 〃I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary.〃



Patient: 〃then send the bill to my father，please.〃



把账单给我父亲



医生:“对你的抱怨我无能为力。那是遗传病。”



病人:“那请你把账单给我父亲吧。”



小建议:

英语笑话通常都是很短的，要是长了就达不到效果了。越是经典的就越短。老外的幽默和我们的不一样的。十句以上都可以算作阅读段了，怎么表演啊，听众本来听英语就费劲，句子又多又长，肯定没兴趣了，还是找些短的来表演吧，BODY LANGUAGE 到位，EXPRESSION 到位就OK了。